The Battle Has Begun

Hari ni hari pertama aku guna ubat baru. Oleh kerana kromosom aku (Ph + AML) sepadan dengan kromosom yang ada pada pesakit CML (chronic myelogenous leukemia), maka doktor cadangkan makan ubat yang diorang guna untuk merawat CML, 400mg sehari. Doktor awal-awal dah bagitau, treatment for AML is very complex and time consuming. Kena banyak sabar dan terima segala kemungkinan. IV (outpatient basis) and total body radiation will still be going on. Harap-harap kombinasi kali ni berhasil. Hmm, macam main Rubik's Cube pulak..

Most common side effects for this treatment:

Anxiety; constipation; cough; diarrhea; dizziness; gas; hair loss; headache; increased tear production; joint pain; loss of appetite; mild muscle cramps or pain; mild stomach pain; nausea; night sweats; nose and throat irritation; stomach cramps or upset; stuffy or runny nose; taste changes; tiredness; trouble sleeping; vomiting; weakness.

Severe side effects (seek medical attention right away):

Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue); black, bloody, or tarry stools; bone pain; change in the amount of urine produced; chest pain; chills, fever, or sore throat; confusion; dark urine; depression; fast or irregular heartbeat; mouth pain, sores, or swelling; muscle pain, weakness, or cramping; one-sided weakness; pale stools; red, swollen, blistered, or peeling skin; severe or persistent headache; severe or persistent stomach pain; severe tiredness or weakness; shortness of breath; slurred speech; sudden, unusual weight gain; swelling of the hands, feet, ankles, or around the eyes; trouble swallowing or talking; unusual bruising or bleeding; vision problems; vomit that looks like coffee grounds; yellowing of the eyes or skin. Huh, scary!

I'm doing my best, let Allah do the rest. Hari ni tak rasa apa sangat lagi. Harapnya berterusanlah begini untuk beberapa hari lagi, sekurang-kurangnya sampai Mama balik Singapore. Pening, letih tu biasalah. Tekak ni memang dah tak merasa apa..bosan! Kat sekolah tadi cuma mampu merasa tekstur lembut cheese cake Tina  dan choc cake Ros (kek coklat ialah makanan kegemaran Adolf Hitler. Tak caya cuba baca biografi dia).  Huhu..cuma mampu bayangkan rasanya..so sad! Perlahan-lahan Allah tarik nikmat hidup. Sabarlah diri, ingat orang lain yang Allah uji lebih hebat lagi.

 "Tidak ada Tuhan (yang berhak disembah) selain Engkau. Maha Suci Engkau, sesungguhnya aku adalah termasuk orang-orang yang zalim". Surah al-Anbiya', ayat 87

Doa yang dianjurkan untuk dibaca ketika kita hampir putus asa. Sesungguhnya keyakinan tu adalah ubat. Mudah-mudahan Allah tetapkan imanku, mudahkan perjalananku, ringankan sakitku dan terima taubatku, amin.